☘ 020; [video]

[solas_ion]

[early morning; Goldenrod Pokemon Center]

Guys, I got this weird feeling. Kind of like I can sense something behind me, but every time I look there's nothing there. Needless to say, something doesn't feel quite right here.

[If one was to look very carefully, they might see a Smoochum hiding behind the PC in the background.]

[mid-morning; Goldenrod Department Store]

[Lancer turns on the video again, seeming even more suspicious than before.]

Look, if someone wants a fight with me, they can come out and say so. Whoever's following me around, knock that shit off.

[And in the background, half-hidden behind a shelf? An incognito Smoochum in too-large sunglasses and a fedora.]

[afternoon; breeding center]

Okay, seriously! I'm tired of this, whoever the hell's stalking me you've been at it for hours! I swear if it's Whitney again I'm getting the hell out of this city.

[Does anyone else see the Smoochum slooooowly advancing on him like ninja cat? Lancer doesn't, because at that particular moment the egg he's been carrying with him decides to start shaking and cracking.]

[His attention diverted, the stalking Smoochum sees her opportunity. Closer and closer and closer...]

[Only to be intercepted by an Audino dropping down from yonder tree and engaging in an ineffective slapfight with Lancer's mysterious stalker. Meanwhile the clueless trainer himself has gone from holding an egg to holding the cutest damned thing ever.]

I swear this place gets weirder the longer I'm here.

Comments

[solas_ion]

...Are you insane?!

[ex_cashcow493]

It was a simple question.

One you have refused to answer outright. That sounds suspicious.

[solas_ion]

Of course I haven't!

[ex_cashcow493]

If you consider it even once, I shall slay you for your perverted ways!

[solas_ion]

Are you out of your mind?!

[ex_cashcow493]

I have had a bit of a rough week, but surely nothing that would question my sanity has come up!

[solas_ion]

I'm questioning it!

[ex_cashcow493]

What is the matter with you?

[solas_ion]

Nothing's wrong with me, you're the one implying ridiculous things!

[ex_cashcow493]

Am I..? I just thought with her attachment.. maybe she just prefers the company of male trainers over female.

[solas_ion]

Can you please just get her to leave me alone?

[ex_cashcow493]

I cannot get in the way of love.

[solas_ion]

...You're kidding. Tell me you're kidding. This is the part where you say 'ha ha, just screwin' with ya, Lancer'.

[ex_cashcow493]

As someone who suffers from a broken heart, I will not inflict such upon my Pokemon. You are to watch over her and if I discover you trying to find a way to abandon her, the two of us will have words.

[solas_ion]

You have got to be kidding me....

[ex_cashcow493]

Maybe I ought to name her after your wife to make it easier.

[ BOY DOES THAT PERK LIL SMOOCHUM UP. ]

[solas_ion]

Hell no!

[ex_cashcow493]

Emer was it?

[ Yes, lil bitty Smoochum is loving this name and it's association. ]

[solas_ion]

Saber, that's not even remotely funny, and if you name her Emer I'm naming this one Guinevere.

[The Audino just sits on the ground and watches this unfold. She could use some popcorn.]

[ex_cashcow493]

You would not dare!

[ That's her wife, Lancer and she will not tolerate the visual of Guinevere being all over a man who slept with half of Ireland.

Meanwhile, "Emer" the Smoochum is too happy with the implication of being Lancer's pokewaifu. ]

[solas_ion]

Change her name and I won't.

[ex_cashcow493]

I will not back down from my decision.

[solas_ion]

Right, because expecting a guy known for not backing down to actually back down is...completely logical?

Guess her name's Guinevere then.

[ex_cashcow493]

[ Twitch. ]

You cannot do that! She hardly looks like a Guinevere!

[solas_ion]

And you think she looks like Emer? Please.