☘ 049; [text]

[solas_ion]

Okay, who started the stupid messages this time?

I swear you're either the most gullible or most stupid bunch ever gathered in one world. One of these days you'll end up spreading an actual curse without realizing it.

[AND BOY YOU DO NOT FUCK ABOUT WITH CURSES AROUND THIS GUY.]

Comments

text;

[solas_ion]

I don't even have one of those.

text;

[nostabbing]

...What.

[THIS IS PARKER; SUCH A THING IS INCOMPREHENSIBLE.]

text;

[solas_ion]

What do you mean, 'what'?

text;

[nostabbing]

WHERE DO YOU KEEP YOUR MONEY

text;

[solas_ion]

NOWHERE YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT AND WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING?

text;

[nostabbing]

I'M NOT SHOUTING

I JUST WANTED TO KNOW IF YOU EVEN HAVE ANY

text;

[solas_ion]

OF COURSE I DO AND DOESN'T THIS COUNT AS SHOUTING OVER TEXT

[Spoilers: he's actually super loaded because Lancer's main expense is alcohol.]

text;

[nostabbing]

GET A BANK ACCOUNT

MAKE SURE IT'S ONE WITH COMPOUNDING INTEREST

IT'S LIKE HAVING YOUR MONEY MAKE MORE MONEY JUST BY BEING MONEY

text;

[solas_ion]

THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE AND I STILL DON'T KNOW WHY WE'RE YELLING AT EACH OTHER

text;

[nostabbing]

IT MAKES TONS OF SENSE

WHY WOULD YOU SETTLE FOR JUST HAVING SOME MONEY WHEN YOU COULD HAVE EVEN MORE MONEY

text;

[solas_ion]

IT CAN'T JUST REPLICATE ITSELF THAT'S STUPID AS HELL

text;

[nostabbing]

YES IT CAN

TRUST ME I'M AN ACCOUNTANT

text;

[solas_ion]

WHAT THE HELL IS AN ACCOUNTANT

text;

[nostabbing]

HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW WHAT AN ACCOUNTANT IS

text;

[solas_ion]

ANCIENT FUCKING IRELAND DIDN'T HAVE THOSE

AT LEAST I DON'T THINK WE DID

text;

[nostabbing]

WHOA IS THAT WHERE YOU'RE FROM

ANCIENT IRELAND HAD SOME GREAT RELICS LIKE SEPULCHRAL URNS AND SILVER CHALICES AND ALL SORTS OF COOL ICON KIND OF STUFF WORKED IN METAL

IT'S SUPER NEAT

text;

[solas_ion]

WELL LOOK AT THAT YOU MIGHT KNOW YOUR SHIT

....Are we going to keep yelling? Because usually I'm all for that, but it feels kind of stupid written out.

text;

[nostabbing]

I TOLD YOU IT'S NOT YELLING THE BUTTOn sometimes just gets stuck.

...Hi.

text;

[solas_ion]

...Yeah, hi.

What the hell were we even talking about?

text;

[nostabbing]

Money.

Don't let people steal yours.

text;

[solas_ion]

Nobody's stupid enough to steal from a guy who thinks punching people is an acceptable way of conveying friendship.

...Which it is, by the way.

text;

[nostabbing]

...Are you one of those guys who likes it when girls punch you?

Re: text;

[solas_ion]

...I'm kind of getting that feeling again--the one where somebody says something that means something completely different to them than it does to me.

[AFTER ALL THIS TIME LANCER IS FINALLY GETTING A HANDLE ON SOCIAL INTERACTION.]

So if I said 'yes', I'd probably sound like I was crazy to you.

text;

[nostabbing]

No, I just knew a guy who liked that. When girls punched him.

He was a sports guy who liked to get drunk and punch things.

text;

[solas_ion]

Hey, my two favorite things.

[are we sure this isn't a commentary on lancer's preferences.]

I don't think it's much different than being punched by anybody else. I mean, my teacher was a woman and she used to beat the living hell out of me.