solas_ion | ☘ 015; [video]

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☘ 015; [video]

[To be a hero was to be a living ideal. A hero's thoughts could only be focused outwardly at all times. Others before himself. The right thing over the easy or even the desired thing. Heroes didn't often have friends, and if they did it certainly wasn't for long.]

[But that was alright. Setanta mac Sualtam had known when he left home at the age of seven that it wouldn't be simple. All he desired was as simple as eternal fame and the protection of his beloved country--everything else was ultimately incidental.]

[As he got older, the child from Muirthemne Plain ended up saying many farewells over his lifetime; and through it all he smiled the best that he could. Because even as a child he'd known knights didn't cry. Heroes were untouchable, undefeatable, unbreakable. Even if a hero should part from all those he was sworn to protect, that was fine as long as what he protected was left unharmed.]

[Even though that was fine with him...it was nevertheless a tremendous strain for any one human or demigod to put on their heart. For one so naturally amicable and charismatic to forever separate himself from those he cared for was painful no matter what the reason was.]

[And if one was to ask that knight what parting hurt the most, and if that knight were to answer honestly...it would be the loss of his only son that carved the most permanent of scars into his heart. Even though he dedicated his life to the protection of his country, the fact remained that the one selfish desire of Cu Chulainn was the wish for a family. The loss of his son by his own hand due to a misunderstanding had nearly broken him, and even now it remained one on a list of mistakes spanning a lifetime.]

[video]

[The hovering camera focused on the back of a figure in black, dark blue hair swaying faintly in the occasional breeze as he walked about five feet in front of the camera. He stood straight and proud as ever; his current emotions aside, he would never allow himself to appear any other way.]

[The concerned buzzing of a Venomoth and the beat of its wings the only indicator of who held the Pokegear, anyone fluent in its language might have been able to tell the insect was saying 'Something's wrong.']

[And of course something was wrong; Lancer seemingly refused to face the camera, assuming he knew it was on.]

Fragarach. Turn that off--knew I shouldn't have told you how to use it.

[And thirdly, there was no emotion in his voice. Bright, cheerful, charismatic Lancer spoke in a near-total deadpan tone. When the Venomoth buzzed in response, Lancer sighed. Hands in his pockets, he still refused to look back at Fragarach and the camera she held. But when he spoke again, it was a little louder--as if Lancer was adressing someone watching rather than his Venomoth.]

What did I tell you, kid? [Calm, dismissive. The flat tone had faded somewhat, the former Servant's voice steady as ever with an added note of 'I told you so'.]

[He stopped walking, standing tall on an empty road. Aside from the Venomoth holding the camera, Servant Lancer was completely alone on the route he currently walked. No Olldóiteán, no Liath Macha or Dub Sainglend...and no sign of Connla.]

[He had always expected this day to come. How many had Cu Chulainn lost? His brother Ferdiad, dead by Lancer's own hand. Scathach, the teacher that had been so dear to his heart, separated from the mortal world and doomed to a fate unknown to him. His dearest and only love Emer, dead for at least two milennia now.]

[And now his only son, lost to him once through a misunderstanding and Lancer's own blade...now surely lost forever through no more than the whim of an extradimensional reality.]

Good luck never lasts.

[Johto had been as good as paradise to him and better. So if he was to continue losing all that mattered...that was fine. Even though it ached more than his own lance had when it cut through his heart, it was alright. Servant Lancer would simply go back to doing what he always had, and be a guard against whoever or whatever would threaten this place that was to be his homeland. So that those who were happy in this place could stay that way.]

[The Hound of Ulster would remain a proud Knight of the Red Branch until such time when this place would send him to his third and final end.]

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It's not going to. What, you think I'd let something that stupid happen to me?

[Looking calmer after the short outburst, he crossed his arms.]

And I don't need your help, anyway.

I never thought it would happen to some of my own, but it happened. It is as I say - I will not permit it to happen to you. You may not need my help, but I am offering it regardless.

...I don't need it.

Look, it's nice of you to offer and everything, but I'm fine. I've been on my own before, I'll do it again.

May I be honest with you, Lancer?

I wouldn't have expected otherwise.

I cannot make the claim to know how it feels, as emotions range from person to person and with experience to experience. I understand vaguely what you are going through however.

I only wish back then I had someone to help. That is why I will not permit you to walk alone.

...

[A sigh.]

Look, I've done this before. I'll deal with it, move on, and what the hell ever happens will happen.

Repeating it does not make it any easier.

No, but I thought you might get the hint if I did.

I have done nothing to earn your attitude, Lancer.

. . .

...yeah, you're right. Sorry.

So speak. Tell me everything that is on your mind. Allow me to help carry the anchors that are dragging your spirits down.

...It's my kid, Connla. He's...he left.

[Lancer didn't look directly at the screen, trying to seem as casual as he could.]

So I guess I'm on my own again.

[ Normally a person would insist that he was in a better place, having returned home, but Saber knows that isn't the case. Treading carefully with Lancer, she shakes her head. ]

You are not without allies in this place, Lancer.

I never said I was, Saber. I've got a decent amount of friends here. More than I ever had when I was alive, at any rate.

[Shrug.]

But nobody else I really feel like traveling with.

Then settle somewhere with your comrades.

[ A tiny scoff. ]

I did not believe I would find any purpose in this realm. Not even my own Master has a purpose for me, traveling with his most cherished, so I thought I would amount to nothing in this place. A realm where heroes are not needed.. it feels alien to say.

Yet, here I am. In a house full of strangers. They have been pleasant so far, but I find it difficult to make friends with.. modern individuals.

I'm not usually much for 'settling', to be honest.

[He thought this over for a second or two, breaking out into an awkward smile.]

There's always going to be a need for heroes, Saber. As long as there's someone or something willing to cause trouble, someone will need people like us.

And sure, it's a little difficult dealing with modern humans sometimes. But it's not too hard once you get used to it.

Doing so will assist with your recovery a lot easier.

[ What? Blinking, she's taken by surprise by his words. ]

You really believe that? [ If that's the case, then the people she was with now would be the ones she would protect with her life. ]

They have a pool here. [ This is the main reason she's having trouble, Lancer. ] And lots of them have different.. personalities.

I don't need to 'recover', Saber.

And sure, of course I believe it. Even someplace like this has trouble now and then, and that's why knights like us exist.

...Is it that hard, really?

You do.

[ In a tone daring him to question her again. ]

Then I shall wait for the day I fight alongside you to defend those who cannot do battle.

[ ... ]

There is one here from my own time.

...there is, huh? Who is it?

... do you know that crazy wizard I told you about when I first arrived?

...

You're kidding.

I would not jest so openly about a topic like that.

Is he still crazy?